Manhood 101: The Lessons I Wish I Had Learned Sooner
At some point in life, every young man will face the same question: What does it mean to stand on my own two feet?
Some will answer, “I’ll get a job.” That’s not a plan. That’s an assumption.
Others will say, “Love will get us through anything.” That’s not reality. That’s a rom-com.
Life isn’t about waiting for things to fall into place. It’s about making decisions that move you forward. And the sooner you get that, the better.
This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being intentional.
Here’s what I wish someone had told me years ago:
1. Standing on Your Own Two Feet (No, a Job Isn’t a Plan)
The world is changing fast. AI is taking jobs. Companies are cutting costs. And the competition isn’t just your neighbor—it’s a robot that works 24/7.
So what’s your plan?
✔ Define your career path. What skills are in demand? What industries are growing?
✔ Get real-world experience. Work while you study. Build a portfolio. Make yourself indispensable.
✔ Network like your future depends on it. Because it does.
A real plan sounds like this:
✅ Earn [specific degree or certification] by [date]
✅ Develop [marketable skill] by [date]
✅ Secure three mentors for accountability
✅ Track hiring trends and total compensation
The bottom line? Self-sufficiency isn’t about hoping—it’s about preparing.
Ask yourself: If I lost my job today, do I have the skills and network to land another one quickly?
2. Marriage – Love Isn’t Enough (Yep, I Said It!)
Love is great. But if love alone was enough, half of marriages wouldn’t end in divorce.
Here’s what matters before you say “I do”:
✔ Know her goals. If you can’t write them down without asking, your relationship is shallow.
✔ Have a plan to support her dreams. Emotionally and financially.
✔ Understand what will and won’t change. Expecting her to not change is a mistake. Expecting yourself to stay the same is, too.
A real man leads—not by control, but by direction.
🔹 If you’re distracting her from her future, you’re setting her up for resentment.
🔹 If you’re helping her achieve her goals, you’re earning her respect.
The right relationship doesn’t just happen. It’s built.
Ask yourself: Am I prepared to lead a family—not just love one?
3. Choose Your HARD – Discipline or Disappointment
Life gives you two options:
Option A: Discipline now = fulfillment and financial freedom later.
Option B: Complacency now = stress and regret later.
The reality? If you’re not growing, you’re dying.
✔ If you’re going with the flow, you’re drifting downhill.
✔ If you’re hoping things work out, you’re waiting for failure.
✔ If you’re investing in your future, you’re stacking the odds in your favor.
This applies to:
📌 Career – Do you have skills AI can’t replace?
📌 Marriage – Are you building a future together or just existing?
📌 Money – Are you planning long-term or just spending?
Every social and financial force is working against you. Only intentional effort changes the trajectory.
Ask yourself: Am I making decisions today that my future self will thank me for—or regret?
Final Thought: The Man in the Mirror
Your life is the result of your decisions.
Not your intentions. Not your potential. Your decisions.
You can take the easier path now—and struggle later.
Or you can Choose Your HARD—and keep your future intact.
Here’s your next step:
If you’re serious about leading yourself (and others) well, we should talk.
No pitch. No pressure.
Just one grown-up conversation about what it really takes to stand on your own two feet—without falling flat later.
Schedule a call with me today. Because real men don’t wait around for life to happen.
They plan, they prepare, and they lead.
What’s holding you back?
HOMESCHOOLING: Haven or Havoc?
Your child's school years are precious and fleeting.
Now could be your best time to step up where your school is letting your child down. Let this series of myth-busting short chapters encourage you.
2 Major Mistakes
Which one will you make?
Which of these 2 retirement mistakes are you making right now? It's impossible to entirely avoid both mistakes.
You won't know for sure which mistake will work out better for you until it's too late.
How to choose?
Finding the Will
(Part 1)
Part 1: Have the will to arrange for a smooth transition when you’re no longer around to answer questions
Have the will to arrange for a smooth transition when you’re no longer around to answer questions (Part 1)
Ensuring your children or other Loved Ones can readily access your important papers when you die entails a sound process versus one or two conversations. You must overcome aversion to the subject of death, procrastination of anything that is long-term, and the tendency to assume things will be fine. Family dynamics can be sweet, spicy, or dicey.
Finding the Will
(Part 2)
Part 2: Getting Organized
While the internet permits convenient access to accounts, policies, and stored documents, it presents a plethora of password management problems. which too many people avoid by succumbing to password laziness, such as:
- re-using passwords for multiple logins, or
- use simple, easy to remember passwords, or
- writing them on sticky notes placed on their monitor or under their keyboard, or
- keeping them in a spreadsheet on their computer, or
- letting their browser remember passwords for them
Embrace Your Clarence
Is Clarence your future?
Golden insight from a golden retriever.
Post-Pandemic W.E.L.L.ness
Working, Earning, Learning, and Launching to Thrive
Where life drastically changed forever two years ago, everyone adjusted to the best of their abilities.
Here are a few of the key adjustments--"pandemic pivots"--that sustained some and prospered others.
Prenuptial Adulting
Equip Them for Happily Ever After
“Mom, Dad, we’re getting married!"
“Wonderful, congratulations! Here’s what you both need to do first.”
Equipping newlyweds with essentials of responsibility leaves plenty of life yet to be discovered on their own. Adults understand that love isn’t oogly feelings; it’s a hard choice. It’s putting your commitments and your money where your mouth is.
Many of the following steps also apply to one’s turning 18 years old. Becoming engaged adds urgency and a deadline.
Rethinking Competing Funds for College and Retirement
We live in a time of skyrocketing inflation topping decades of unbridled higher education costs.
Is the tension between funding your retirement and funding (at least partially) your children’s college education keeping you up at night?
You’re not alone.
Married? Is Your Endgame 100% or Just 50%?
Are you single? That other 50% could be whoever is most important to you.
Multiple unforgiving players factor into your retirement and estate plans (collectively your “endgame”). Household names include the Internal Revenue Service, the Social Security Administration, and the Center for Medicare and Medicaid Services. Key decisions with these players are nearly impossible to reverse. Plus, if you qualify for a pension, how you activate it is another irreversible decision.
Are you more of a planner than your spouse? It’s all too common for one spouse to blindly trust the planning spouse. Countless endgame “plans” were created by 50% of a couple:
